Thank you for this, Chris. I really needed to read it. Because so many people have asked me why I felt the need to "rescue" AXBF and I could not understand what they were talking about. I thought and said, "I wasn't trying to rescue anyone, I was trying to be in a relationship." But after reading your post I've come to realize, every complaint he had, I had the answer and the resources to "fix" the problem, and I did so freely and continuously, day after day, while ignoring and shoving back my own needs. Waiting to get something back. Savoring the brief thanks and kudos and other acknowledgements. Waiting for the love and affection that never came, and then becoming devastated when the final abandonment hit me.
Thanks again for sharing.