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Old 08-16-2012, 11:17 PM
  # 33 (permalink)  
TakingCharge999
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Join Date: Nov 2008
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I used a meditation CD once, about forgiveness.. in there you imagine yourself in a calm space and the person you need to forgive comes along to see you. You kind of let your imagination roam free to see "what happens".. I saw XABF, who could not stop crying, asking for my forgiveness and saying X and Y event were unfair to me... it felt so sincere I started crying as well and "told him" it was OK, that we both did our best then... I saw and felt his humanity and was able to feel compassion for both of us.

When this meditation finished I felt slightly more healed. I once saw a shaman (he did not call himself this way but he was ..) and he would say it was indeed part of his soul that arrived to deliver the healing message. Others might think its just a tool of our imagination to soothe the psyche and has nothing to do with souls or energy. Whatever works right.. ?

I am learning, that healing from my abandonment issues is a lifelong homework I have... but realizing I have them is 50% of the work already. IMHO it takes years of therapy and other tools...

About enablers and how we are tools to active addicts, it sounds brutal but its also freeing. At least it was, when I was green with envy for the new woman, then I realized that was not love either, just his world full of enablers... other friends who did not drink as much and scolded him for his habits, were OUT. Talking to another friend who was also distancing himself from XABF made me see, it indeed was not personal, and his alcoholism was (is) very real.

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