I am doing a little better. I keep reaching out more..on SR, to friends, alled Alanon group list, etc. Doing everything I can to avoid him. When we've exchanged 4yr old daughter, she just walks down driveway to his car and same when he brings her back, I won't see him. I literally am pretending he's dead. There is no other way! Thanks for checking..I'm fighting a daily battle and hopefully before I know it I won't feel this heaviness in my spirit.