Wow, LifeRecovery, that is an incredibly insightful thought.
You are so right, we so often think "I love A so much" trumps any other feeling, especially "I cannot live with alcoholic chaos anymore".
You are right, they are 2 equally valid ideas and they CAN co-exist.
That was one of the traps I fell into for many years, and I never understood the psychological mechanism that you've just articulated.
How incredibly freeing!!!!
BothSidesNow