Hey there SE.
Sounds like you are having a really confusing, tough time at the moment. I've thought a lot about your posts and hesitated from posting, because I feel like there might be a range of other things going on with you/ in your life/ or that have gone on in your life before that you can't/don't want to talk about. And some of the things I would share in the context of "what have worked for me" might not be appropriate.
I'm very glad you are seeing a therapist, that did help me a lot, it was one of my most stellar choices! I hope it helps you too. Perhaps, right now, would be a time to focus on your own healing and well-being? Not abandoning your daughter, just not pushing things, if you are confident she is safe where she is.
Perhaps stepping back a little (with love) and always allowing her the open opportunity to start communication, but concentrating on getting yourself really well, physically/mentally/emotionally and in a good place?
and ditto your BF? I don't know though: you know your situation best.
I wish you well in your journey (()).