Wow! EnglishGarden your words could not ring more true.
I spent years tolerating emotional and verbal abuse, betrayal after betrayal, financial ruin etc...
I knew I wanted out. I knew it was unhealthy for me and for my boys. But magical thinking, shame, and everyother reason so often cited for staying kept me in that awful situation. It wasn't until he threatened me with my life that I finally did something.
Looking at it with a little distance now, I can find reason to be grateful. It lit the fire under me that I needed.
When I learned yesterday that the terrorizing and criminal threatening charges were not going to be prosecuted. I finally called the lawyer about the divorce. Why hadn't I done that already? I could probably analyze that and come up with a reason. Regardless, the event made me take action.
It feels strange to feel thankful for that but I do.
Sweetiewalls, I feel for you especially having to co-parent (if he actually does parent) with someone who can be so cruel to the mother of his child. Your baby knows that you are the rock in the family and the one who can be relied upon for love and support. You are a good mother and deserve praise for doing what is right. I am envisioning you weathering this difficult storm and gleaming like a rainbow.
MamaKit