Dear xxxxxx, I am happy for you that you have, at least , been validated and that the system is working, at least partially, to protect you.
Good for you that you took the appropriate steps--it couldn't have been easy.
About this "guilt" that you speak of: Do you remember when we were kids, and we felt guilty for the bad things that happened--even when it had nothing to do with us?
Doesn't this look sort of like that---you feel guilty for what HE did to himself?
Even your head is telling you that the guilt is unnecessary---but your gut is still reacting like that. I suspect that this is from the patterns that we have left over from living in dysfunctional family situations as a young person.
It looks like all co-dependents have a huge parcel of guilt that (we) carry around on the top of our heads.
I think that recovery work addresses this issue of inappropriate guilt. What do you think of this reasoning to your question?
dandylion.