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Old 07-30-2012, 08:21 PM
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Marjoram
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Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Michigan
Posts: 832
Never ending cycle

I've been here before, and as of right now, don't want to say under what name.

I do agree that some can return to drinking in moderation, but most of us here cannot. I am one of those.

My husband drinks and so do I. We are good people that do a lot to help others - friends, family, and civic obligations. We appreciate the simple things in life and love our time in the outdoors. But, for some reason, in our day to day life, we cannot keep the drinking under control. He has a harder time admitting to the problem, but I'm ready to AGAIN. If my Mom knew how much I drank, it would break her heart.

I'm in my 40's and have been drinking pretty darn hard for over ten years. The last five more than I care to admit.

My fear is my health. It always has been. I love to cook and cook healthy. I love to walk, work hard, and play hard. So, why I continue to let this rotten monster take me over is beyond me. I can make it until about the same time every day, and then it overwhelms me. I cringe at my next doctor's appointment.

I'm debating AA, but still not sold on it. I guess I'll know when that option is one I have to take.

I've gone through hiding bottles, hiding my drinking, hiding it all. I did it before and I'm doing it again. Changing stores to buy from, wrapping bottles in paper before tossing in the trash. Breath mints to hide the smell, etc.

It is truly a day at a time and I hope tomorrow I can make it through day one.

I just need to reach out again.

Well wishes to every one here. It's a good group.

Life is a gift. Let's not screw it up with alcohol.
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