View Single Post
Old 07-25-2012, 08:27 AM
  # 8 (permalink)  
jamaicamecrazy
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 338
Thanks for your input. We had seen a counselor starting in 2007 and continued for 3 years-off and on. I sometimes see him alone when I need to process what is going on. He encouraged us to separate which was good and my husband always brings up things he learned from him. So I guess it was money well spent even if it did not have the outcome I had hoped for. He is a "safe place" to go to now when we need to talk about difficult things. For my husband- I think it helps keep his rage in check. For me it just feels safer to say the things I need to say.

I am going to think about this for a while. If I know my husband he will drag his feet on making the appt. I don't know, It somehow feels different this time. I feel like I am doing it for me without the expectation that it will make him want to change. Its like I have to see with my own eyes and hear with my own ears when he says that the alcohol is not the problem and that he wants a divorce. I need to feel that sting to help me shut the door. And of course I want him to have to say it out loud to me-in front of a witness.
I feel like if I just let him off easy its another way of enabling...sparing his feelings...catering to his needs.
I know I should be ready to take the next step because all the evidence is there. Yet I know I am not there yet. Maybe this is the push I need.
jamaicamecrazy is offline