To me, the words in Cyranoak's original post sting. But so do the words Melody Beattie wrote is describing typical codependant traits. I get the same flushing of the face ~ suck in my breath and say "oh my" as I recognize myself in those printed words.
As I became aware of those traits in myself, I acknowledge that they are part of a pattern I have repeated, only then can I take action to stop repeating the pattern.
Cyranoak, the aspiring realist, voiced the words that I have actually used, seen, heard and fallen for myself.
Cyranoak, I wish you peace as you continue your journey.