Cyranoak,
Alanon has helped me to live with her
And Alanon helped me learn to live without her. I was a lot stronger than I thought. All it took was taking that first step. I can honestly say I was scared to death, worried about doing the wrong thing and sure I was screwing things up.
It was the best thing I ever did.
Trust your instincts and let go and let god. You will have the support of all of us here.
Good luck.
Your friend,