This may sound silly.......but did you know that our digestive tract has more neurons in it than our brains? At least......that's what my doctor told me. So when people say "trust your gut"....there is actually a logical reason why you should do that.
Anyone who minimizes the drug or alcohol use of someone else always concerns me. A very dear friend of my son has a mother who is a late stage alcoholic. He advised my son "man.....you're not an alcoholic....I know what one looks like......you just love to party". My son holds on to that statement that minimized his addiction like it was undisputable fact and it aids him in the progression of his disease (he is now a meth and heroin addict.....along with his problem with alcohol). Minimizing does nothing but further the progression of the disease. If it's a problem for you.......it's a problem. It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks (including me).
You continue to be in my prayers as you try to cope during this very stressful time. Breathe......make sure you are taking care of you first.........if you do that, all else will fall into place.
gentle hugs
ke