Thanks for the replies. Having no contact was a choice I made to help me because he was hurting me and I didn't want to be hurt anymore ( which hurts but in a different way if you know what I mean) I know everyone is different as far as bottoms are concerned and I realized last night most people hit bottom with loss - his problem he has nothing to lose and that's how he lives his life because I honestly don't think he cares if he lives or dies. I don't blame the women I feel sorry for them. He's left a trail of broken hearts along the way - mine included.
His mode of operendi is to come in and out of my life so it may be months till he tries to contact me. I guess what I do then will let him know I've changed.