Thank you TJP. You know, it wasn't too long ago where I would have spun my wheels trying to justify my actions or get caught up in his pain and try to appease him...it is HARD to be tough but I did it and I'm not kidding when I say this place is what taught me to recognize the behavior patterns.
I heard yesterday that he may be moving out of state to his Mom's. I feel for her. She herself is in a bit of denial, she's getting on in years, has a farm and tons of rescued cats and dogs to care for, a husband that does not help much, and now she could be taking on this. Maybe one day I will introduce this place to her. She realizes she's caught up in the enabling mode but she hasn't hit rock bottom yet like I did.
You're right in saying that I should not relax yet. Any time something new is presented to my ex, he gets all riled up, lashes out, but calms quickly until the next thing crosses his path. But I'm ready...I think...lol. He has not yet got the rest of his stuff - I have a feeling he is working all this week at a side job to get some money in order to move. I haven't asked. I don't plan on asking him anything. I'm just not interested anymore in the life he leads except that I hope he gets help and is safe. I wish him no harm but I'm done with the harm I accepted from his addiction.