DoubtfulDebs

it's right there - saying you need "help" and support - i mean this in the nicest way because in know that might look a bit harsh!! :ghug3

any thought at all that supports the future possible use of alcohol, however speculatively, IS your beast.

any thought at all that says "you alone can't do this, you NEED help, you NEED to keep reading posts here (OR you might have a little drinkipoos")" and so on, is the beast.
sure, read the forums, join in, whatever, when it's helping you with learning the recovery method you choose, but if a little voice in your head hints that without the forums, you'll drink - that's your beast.

now i'm worried i'm sounding like a big horrible person after youwere so kind to reply and everything, thats not it at all!!

but just read the hell out of that book, read the posts on here especially by terminally unique who has a good grasp on the technique, and in fact you can teach yourself best by spotting other people's beasts at work (just don't tell them unless they actually ask) - you'll see plenty, spot them in the media when people talk about addiction... you won't be short of nice little opportunities!

your beast is any thought at all that goes "x, y, and z, and/or/but then i might drink."

simples!

and thanks saskia too, it is possible, there are lots more going far longer than me, in the end the only person who makes that decision is you, i know i didn't have a disease and if you know that about yourself, we're just here to get straight, nobody elses way of coping matters to us, unless it starts sounding beast-ly, in which case we can just sort of go "oh, you again!" - quietly in our own heads - and keep right on recognising it and ignoring its demands.

it's A V Recognition T, not A V argue/blame/start-to-be-strangely-convinced-by T!!

i probably won't be around much at all, because talking about an addiction i no longer have (so long as i don't drink, and, i will never drink again) is kind of... feels odd! i want to watch my motives, y'know, why would i want to keep reminding myself? things like that - i'm still working it all out for myself right now!