Hello Rebecca... welcome. I did the same as you... went to AA, and hated it initially and hated myself as kept thinking I didn't want to be like THEM. I had alcoholics in my family, especially didn't like my dead father as I felt he'd ruined my life.
Then realised, after a lot of reading, coming here, and going to meetings... I did have drink problems that I needed to work on. And strangely, I even understood my dead father a bit more... doesn't mean I've totally forgiven him, just letting it go. The big light going on in my head in a meeting was a guy saying it doesn't matter how much you drink or the way you drink... it's what it does to you that counts. I was ruined emotionally.
You need to get through the first stages though, find a way to do it. Come on here, I'm only 3 months sober (but feel pretty good now) and you'll get lots of advice and support from people who've come out the other side.
If you do enough reading, support groups, coming here, you'll find something to help you accept it. I also saw a therapist who said to me "your weakness will become your strength", as in my alcoholism would become my strength.. at the time I thought "yeah right". But it has. I'm far better sober.
Good luck, keep everyone posted.