My answer to number 3 was relief.
IamAbstinent, you did not drink for any of those reasons. You drank because you just like any of us that drank/used ourselves into oblivion we did it because we were being selfish invdividuals just thinking about us and nothing more. We just wanted to do it and we did no matter how terrible the consequences may be.
And GT is right your reasons are pure beast activity. It's a bit like when you go to meetings and they say if you don't make sure you do this this this and this you may drink again. That is what you are doing... it's your way of having escape route to a relapse whenever you choose.
Sorry if I sound harsh but I'm not trying to be but it's just how RR works. It's honest and to the point and best thing is it works when you follow a few little tips.