Drink everyday from when I get home from work, start drinking in the mornings on weekends. I used to only drink at parties, but I'd get wrecked. Then I'd hit the bar every night. Figured out I was going there for the booze, not the people, so I cut out the middleman, started getting my two 40oz malt liquors a night, which became three. I don't want to even venture a guess how many of those I could down now. Then liquor came into the picture.
On weekdays I still generally keep it together because I'm a pretty large guy by now and my tolerance is "up there". That just means I get to feel worse the next day.
Tired of hearing about what I said the day before that I don't remember today, tired of not following through on things that would make my life better. Used to have friends, now I hardly even see family, but I guess I stopped calling people because I was ashamed. Or maybe they stopped calling me.
It is really nice to be able to tell somebody, even if it's on an internet forum. I can't talk to anyone I know about it, and I don't think I can talk about it to anyone in person without breaking down. Even writing posts is very emotional for me. Coming here and reading other people's experiences helped me stop drinking for a month recently, but I had to see if maybe this thing between me and the booze had changed. Nope. Same old story. Gonna give it another shot. Thanks for your stories, they help me out a lot.
Good luck all