Cocaine seriously disrupts the natural flow of dopamine. It will take 7 years for your brain to develop new pathways. It's a hideous drug. what makes us go "up" so high will make us go "down" real low in terms of how we feel and act. I'd stop soon or you stop the damage you are doing to your brain.
Why do we do the things we do? Who knows!?
Once a month, maybe figure out how not to indulge and to stop. That is up to you.
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