Thanks to you all. I feel like my big, hard-headed, sweaty fight with myself of am-I-or-aren't-I? is finally over....The hot air out of the balloon has been released, and the pressure valve of trying to moderate drinking is done....I feel free and have never felt quite like this....I've never truly accepted it, and the feeling right now is humbling...I have allowed myself to rest....and to move on.....finally. It's been a long, wild ride. I had the brakes all along.