Originally Posted by
NikNox 
But we are all very surprised and somewhat shocked that she hasn't even attempted to contact her child, to say sorry, beg for forgiveness, beg her daughter not to abandon her.
I've learned not to expect any semblance of decency, compassion, or "sorry" from anyone in active alcoholism or addiction. God knows I was incapable of that before I got clean/sober for the last time in 1990.
As for the lump in her throat, it sounds like she did a terrific job of getting all those ugly feelings she's been carrying around for years onto paper and let it go, at least for now.
It's amazing how much I am affected physically when I start stuffing emotions and not finding a way to express them.
She's a lucky girl to have you in her life!
