Originally Posted by
112408forever 
I am going to be very strong and let him sleep over at my house MAX 2 times a week. and he is not to come in my house with ANY alcohol at all.
Can you explain this to me?
Which two nights per week will he sleep over?
What determines these two nights?
What if he wants to sleep over, doesn't bring ANY alcohol, but has had a social drink prior to coming over?
What if he wants to sleep over a third night and promises he will stay sober that day? Will you reward his sobriety with a sleep over night?
A healthy boundary might look like this:
I am going to focus on what I want out of my one precious life. I am going to give you the opportunity to focus on your life.
I am going to work on my recovery from living with active alcoholism by attending as many Alanon meetings as I can in 90 days. I am going to give you the opportunity to work on your recovery by finding your own program and working it 90 days.
After 90 days of working our own recovery programs, we can go on a date.