We have spoken about the divorce since the day he blew my world apart. I haven't fully processed everything yet. I am learning more and more each day as to what is happening. I am still crushed, but since he is being so cold about it and not wanting to talk at all, I am left with no choice. I can talk all I want, but he isn't listening. He tunes it out. I so truly wanted to do some sort of counseling or whatever it is that we (he) needed but he rejected it without thought. It's even more difficult since we haven't "lived" under the same roof in quite a while, but that was a choice for work, nothing else. I do believe that living apart gave him a look at what single life would be like. He has no one to "answer to", ya know. No responsibilities and that's also when his drinking became so much more. It was already getting pretty bad but it became heavier and heavier. He talks to that girl still, knowing how much it bothers/hurts me and he doesn't give a rats behind. I don't like her. But I also don't like him much anymore. I hate that I still love him.
We have never spoken in front of or near the kids about it. I don't think he knows exactly what it is, but yes, my son is very smart. I have 3 very good friends that I talk to, who are my best support and are guiding me through some of these things. We are going to try and make this a quick thing, as long as he doesn't turn around and be a d**k. Which, at any given moment, he can be. It's just who he's become. I have to remember everyday that he is no longer the man I married. He is a whole different person, and not a good one.