Oh yeah I should have said, my friend is well aware of the situation with AH (things are certainly worse but he knows much of the history prior to this summer onward).
And he was always clear about not wanting to make things worse or make me feel like he expected anything. He's a genuinely nice guy-- after all I don't know too many single guys who'd be not at all obnoxious about just being friends even if he wished there were something more. If he has had alterior motives I never knew or sensed them, so I think he's probably genuine in his desire to want to hang out as friends. It's my own emotional state and motives that I don't trust right now. I guess if I give myself permission to just enjoy his company and not feel guilty for that fact, it'll all be fine.
In my mind I sort of thought that I had to have it all sorted out before I decided whether to hang out with him or not (common theme for me-- I can't "act" before I have it all figured out and that's just stupid thinking). So, I dont' have any idea what anything beyond today will hold in all of my life and I'm increasingly (compared to last year) okay with that. I like D's company, he's fun to be with and we share a lot of common interests so why not be friends again and just be content with that? That's where I'm at right now and that's thanks to you all!