Yesterday was 31 days!
I never truly believed this day would ever come. I thought to myself I'm just going to try to stop drinking again because I don't know what else to do. To not try again would be to lose those I love the most.
Before joining SR, I read the posts for a few days. I must say that the stories I read gave me some hope and inspired me to attempt to quit drinking once again. I also learned a lot here. I knew about AA previously, but I never knew of any alternative programs to quit drinking. I learned that there are no "one size fits all" methods and whatever choice you make that keeps you sober is good. After much reading I decided that AVRT seems like a good fit. I've gone through the crash course online and today I started reading Rational Recovery.
It's amazing how much time and money I put into drinking! There is so much planning involved! Even though I was a total drunk, I was very good about not drinking and driving so I had to make sure I had enough wine. Then I would be at the store trying to decide if I should only get 2 bottles of wine so I wouldn't drink more than that or should I just go ahead and get plenty so that I wouldn't get into our expensive wines that could not be easily replaced. Oh, and the lying, the sneaking, the bruises that I didn't know where they came from, the puffy red face, the worry I put my family through, all ugly stuff!
I don't post often, but I do make sure to get on here every day which is what has helped me get through these last 31 days. I sometimes feel like I don't post because I don't have much to contribute when there is already so much wisdom here, but I need to get over that. I want to be helpful to someone as so many people's words have been helpful to me.
Thanks to you all for being here!