DayTrader

Ahhh..... I see. There ARE military AA meetings - for service members and their family. Usually they're on regular Army, Navy, AirForce bases though......and the guard is a tad different. It might be worth looking into though as military ppl tend to have a somewhat high % of alkies (compared to other careers anyway).

I've also been thinking about the "I need F2F" comment you made a while ago. I ABSOLUTELY recommend face to face over internet sponsorship or telephone sponsorship.....unless both parties are long-term sober. I do see those sorts of relationships working out. New though, and not through the steps (really) yet, I think F2F is where it's at. However..........maybe that's just not in the cards for you. Maybe you have to go somewhat unconventional for a while....I did.

I was positive I NEEDED a sponsor to beat all sponsors. I needed someone who could think on my level, understand all my "stuff," knew every trick and turn of recovery, would always have an answer for me, could guide me in life, knew the book page by page, was wise beyond his years.......and more. What I got was a guy who was pretty far from all of that. Heck, he didn't even know the steps as the BB lays them out. He had "his" version of the program and that's what I did. Somehow....working "his" version of the program I got and stayed sober. According to some folks, that's not possible.....but obviously it is. So, if it's your belief that you HAVE to have a sponsor who does X or Y......my experience is that you don't.

Now, at about a year or so, I started hitting a funk.....things were stalled and I felt I was going backwards. I was discussing everything with a friend/mentor in the program and the advice to me was, "Maybe you need to take things up a notch and that's gonna require new meetings, new fellowship friends, exposure to different aspects of the program and recovery, new teachers, a new sponsor, and a better/closer relationship with your God." Maybe the same applies to you....? Maybe it's time to graduate from whatever grade you're in in recovery and move up? ....and I know.......I know it's even a bit scary.....just like moving to the next grade in school was. I had a helluva time finding even ONE strong meeting.....so I found that direction and guidance I was craving online in open talks on a couple websites. Those guys/gals became my teacher. I still had a sponsor.....but he wasn't my ONLY supply of information on recovery. I had to go "seeking" as the 11th step suggests. In short, I had to take responsibility for my own recovery and take some actions outside the "norm." Perhaps you need to do the same as well....?

One last thing..... You mentioned something about not telling anyone your sex inventory because you don't feel comfortable doing it. Like I said earlier, I worked A program but not the real AA program for about a year and while I didn't drink.......it was obvious I was outgrowing it. It wasn't "working" too well anymore. I was better than when I came in but I certainly wouldn't have considered myself recoverED. RecoverING......sure, but that was on a good day. It DID help when I started following the directions in the book.....doing what they suggested even when I was uncomfortable (not TOO often) and even when I didn't want to (almost all the time.....lol). I'd suggest taking a good look at why you're not willing to do certain parts and how that may gel with the statement right before the steps, "Half measures availed us nothing."