Everytime I stepped inbetween my son and the consequences of the behavior - I robbed him of the experiences he desparately needed in order to want to change.
It was hard to let go and wonder how he was managing but after awhile when _ I _ finally saw how I was making his continued drug use easier- I didn't want that on my conscience.
I can compare it to trying to keep someone from putting their hand into a flaming fire- but they keep trying because they never feel the heat. What happened when I was not there to 'save' or 'fix' is exactly what he needed and more importantly...what - I - needed to stay safe & sane.
His behavior kept repeating and he 'got away with it' time after time-usually because someone would step in and clean up his mess or otherwise make his life of using easier/possible.
Things had to become much worse for him before he was ready to stop. I had to stop getting in the way.
Sooner or later he was headed for: death, hospitalization or an institution.
I'm happy to say that going to jail (no more bailing out from mom & dad) was what it took. He's been clean for 6 years- after using for 10 years, with some brief moments of recovery inbetween.
I hope you will continue to come here and also attend as many Alanon meetings as you are able.
Another thing that helped me was to attend some open NA and AA meetings on my own. Listening to their stories shared there taught me alot.