26thw

I just made my 3rd week without a drink and as I reflect on my journey, I can see that it was a trip with many roads and a few u turns. I started out thinking the only way for me to succeed was to approach it with the help of AA, and I purchased the Big Book, and a few other AA publications. Right from the start though, I was just a little concerned with the control that I perceived AA required and with the idea that I would never be cured of my "disease". I spoke to a fellow I new who was in AA for over 30 yrs and his advice confirmed my fears that I would be getting into something I would never feel comfortable with and something that wouldn't be supported by my wife. So I never attended the AA meetings I was told to attend (90/90). I was going to quit drinking on my own, and I was using a method I used over 40 yrs ago to quit smoking. I just told myself that I was not a smoker and what ever urges I had to smoke could not be true feelings (me) because, I was not a smoker, simple but it was effective (me vs. it)

When I investigated RR I was delighted to see that it too had a similar message about how we have two parts to our brain/being and that the part known as the Beast wasn't our true self, but only influence our self. As a novice in my practice and understanding I realize I have a way to go, but my point is I am so happy and relieved now because I feel I have a solid and proven (smoking) road to travel on which fits my personality, intellect, and family. Looking forward to my future.