In my experience, holding in your feelings toward the whole situation is bad for both of you. He needs to feel the weight of what you have been going through. I waited until just recently to "unload" everything I was feeling on my fiance. I wish I had done it sooner instead of waiting 2+ years. This has been going on for a while in my life, the constant worrying, etc.. and I'm just NOW(these past few weeks) turning things around for ME. I stopped worrying because I know there will be relapses in the future. Think of it this way: Why worry about how much he has on his plate, when he hasn't considered how much you've got on yours? When I told my fiance everything I've felt and the emotions I've had to deal with, etc he nearly broke down. He hadn't once considered what I was holding within myself and the weight that I had to bear on my shoulders, he only thought about himself and his drug.. nothing else matters in active addiction. In my situation I was the only person who knew he was actively using aside from his "friends", and I made a conscious decision(a poor one at that) not to tell anyone else because I did not want to put his family through all of the stress again.. and I had to live with that every day. I had to deal with the pain and the fear and the complete and utter loneliness that came along with that decision. NOW he knows that pattern will not continue and if I do have suspicions of a relapse that I will not keep it to myself this time around. Boundaries are VERY, VERY important now and always, no matter what stage of addiction/recovery someone is in. I can't stress that enough. That may even be why you are still feeling so blah and as if nothing has taken a turn for the better. You've got to take care of YOU and put your boundaries out there asap. If you still don't feel ready for it and he is working the 12 steps, that could be your opening to do so. I'd just put some thought into it. Holding back what you've gone through isn't healthy for you, and he needs to know what his actions have done to you.. it's going back to that good ol' "for every action there is a consequence." And yes, it is important for him to focus on his recovery at this time, but he needs to see the whole picture.. not just what his addiction has done to him and his life, but what it has done to those who are still in his life.