LTD- I actually spoke to a public defender (even though I had a lawyer she was nice and spoke to me while I was at the jail) and she arranged for a dv advocate to be a the video arraignment that had to take place before I was released. They aren't really able to do much legally but they are emotionally supportive and supposedly work with the prosecutors office to protect victims but that did not work out at all when AH was arrested last year for assaulting me. Right now my lawyer has been the best person who has been able to get things done swiftly to help. The RO is in place solidly for a full year and it is on file with the court that there is a history of DV with AH (that was the case well before this weekend).
You're right about the gun... I guess I'm emotional and thinking not real clearly.... There are certainly enough calls on record to 911 of my being afraid of him and asking for help that it would not be hard to show that I was defending myself but I have no interest in testing that theory. I just feel totally dismayed by the uselessness of calling the police and am unsure what my means of protection are at this point... Short of disappearing or moving to a new town where the police aren't collosal assholes, I feel like my options for protection are minimal. I think we all have heard of plenty of stories of crazy ex's who violate RO's-- they are paper and while I have that legal protection, I feel like it is just a matter of time before AH violates it... He knows where I work, he knows where I pick the girls up from school and I am genuinely afraid for my well being like I have never been before. Unless he is in jail I will not feel safe.