Oh dear god. I just cut the cord and it hurts. I endured a stupid conversation that started in circles and ended with him making fun of al-anon and my recovery. Then he called me an alcoholic. I laughed. I managed to slip in a goodbye and it's over. (A plea to self- Please for the love of myself and god, do not contact him anymore). I see how this is a cycle of defensiveness between two crazy people. Truthfully, tonight I just feel rage, emptiness, grief, and unbelievable cynicism about romantic love and relationships. Think I will stick to friends and family. Enough is enough.
Anvilhead- I see that it is about me and I am working on that. I realize I am unavailable for intimate love. I keep setting myself up for more hurt and I have to let go.
Zoso- Enough was enough from the start. I held on because I was blind. I confused love with something else entirely. This man never loved me. I chose a man who could not love me. That is what frightens me. I read your previous post and it does give me hope. And yes, I like to hear what you think. I have more hope for recovery tonight.
Fourmaggie- Tough question that I cannot honestly answer. I am sitting with this one.
Outtolunch- Thanks, I did not write it. Been there done that.
Thanks to all!