My son is a drug abuser and my husband use to be a heavy drinker. My life revolved around my son, spying on him, reading his text messages, Facebook messages, etc. to try to keep him away from drugs. I couldn't do it and I realize know I made it worse. My son overdosed and my husband had to resuscitate him. Did I finally stop? No, I got worse. I needed to keep a better eye on him. If I could have handcuffed him to me, I would have to keep him from drugs. He got help and spent some time at an inpatient recovery center. I got help there too. He stole from me, lied to me, embarrassed me, etc. Everything you could imagine he's done. I forgave him because I learned about the disease and I learned that he wasn't doing those things to me, but did them becuase of what the drugs had done to his brain. I've learned to get over it and move on. I'm learning to keep a distance and try to separate myself from his daily life. It's hard for sure. You need to recover too. It's the hardest thing I've ever done and I've been through a lot. I'm sure this has really taken a toll on you. You deserve to heal too.