Thread: Letting Go
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Old 03-18-2012, 08:08 PM
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KuanYin
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Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: In the South
Posts: 228
Oh Erynn, my dear how my heart goes out to you and aches for you. You are obviously a very intelligent young woman, and you have good instincts and good insight. Our hearts sometimes lead us astray, but we can learn. Try to think of it like this; at least you did not marry him and/or have children with him, only to invest a lifetime raising children who may become addicts. I have a 26 year old son who is an injection addict. That is hell. I've left boyfriends, I've left an addict husband, but I cannot divorce a child. I can't take him back and say "Um, this isn't what I wanted, can I please have another?" I love my AS with all my heart and soul, but detaching and walking away from ones offspring is devastating.

Your addict bf that you no doubt love, and have been through so much with, apparently has no desire for recovery. Add to that, his obvious character flaws. I can tell you this, it is better to be lonely while alone than to be lonely while with another person. It sounds like he is never actually present for you, even if he is physically in the room with you.

You will get over him because it sounds like you've had enough, and that you want to get over him. Time will help you. Time and distance. Cutting all contact, and moving your life in a different direction from him. Leave him in the past, move your life forward. And your heart and soul will heal by helping others who are going through the pain that you are feeling, and the pain you've suffered over the past years with him. We heal through helping others.
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