Originally Posted by
EnglishGarden 
You do not need to make any decisions about your marriage right now or at any time in the near future. That can wait. I would for now take a break from communication with your AH and his mother or anyone associated with him. You do not have to justify it. Just say, "I am taking a break to clear my head." No long discussions or justifying. Say it and be done. Mail the phone back. Don't share the number of your new one. Block emails.
Then concentrate on making a concrete foundation of security--emotional, mental, physical, spiritual--for your children, with your family's help. That done, you can eventually return to the issue of the marriage to a coke addict.
I hope so much that the call today to your family puts something in motion for your children's greater good.
Beautifully written English Garden. And it is exactly the advice my counselor gave me.......you don't have to make any decisions about your marriage now or anytime in the near future. It's a relief to realize that's truth. Hugs to you sweet Yez! We are all here for you!