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Old 03-12-2012, 05:33 AM
  # 19 (permalink)  
kmangel
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 598
When my son first came home from rehab, I wanted to believe that my son wanted to be clean and sober more than anything in the world. Some people here said having him move in with us was not a good idea, but we wanted our story to be different. It's not so much that our son didn't want to be clean and sober because I believe he does--but my husband and I were not detached enough to institute boundaries and enforce them. Your husband's mother may be where we were (without the rehab)--wanting to believe her son's promises. Perhaps she'll eventually see the truth. One thing about addiction, it is progressive so the blinders she has on now will not shield the truth of what her son is doing for long. She wont be able to ignore when her valuables begin to disappear. The day will probably come when she'll see the truth and will send your husband packing. He'll want to come back home to you. What then?

For my husband and me, our son's girlfriend took him in. We're waiting to see how long that lasts. He's not actively using as far as I know (he relapsed a couple times while living with us) but he still has a lot of baggage--not working being one. I wonder how long the girlfriend is going to put up with our son not working. He says he's looking for a job. He lived with us for seven months with only one brief spell of working. As long as he has someone to smooth over the rough waters, it appears he has no real motivation to take responsibility. I hope I'm wrong. Time will tell.

There are things you can do now to protect yourself. For example, does your husband have access to your bank account?
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