Welcome abw -
It's really good that you realize how addictive the pills are and want to stop before it gets worse (as it usually does with any addiction). So many people have developed the same issues, so don't feel ashamed.
It's probably best that you talk to the doctor who prescribed the pain meds and be honest about how much you've been taking. (Chances are, they'll admire you for this, as they usually see the folks who are trying to get the pills, not stop them!). Hopefully this doctor can help you decide the best way to minimize any withdrawal symptoms........
This is a great place for support - glad you've joined us!