Originally Posted by
Tuffgirl 
I could have written your post two years ago (or my own version of it). I remember asking my RAH once "why do I have so much power over you and your life? I don't want it".
I was also amazed at just how much he could mind read. I mean, he was regularly telling me exactly what I was thinking and feeling and why.
When I stopped reacting to it, it slowly stopped working for him. I got very good at being vague - so when this stuff happened, I would say "huh" or "really" or my favorite: "what?"
He's over 16 months sober now, and I am happy to report he doesn't mind read anymore. Apparently that was his own stuff he was trying to project onto me. He really couldn't read my mind after all. Huh. Really (said sarcastically).
Mind reading is bait. Don't get hooked.
Yes, I have to stop reacting to it. I love the fact that he can predict my every thought and feeling, too. You will never forgive me. You glare at me. You make me walk on eggshells. UGH, seriously?
I'm finally tired of being in my own codie victim mode and it feels good to realize that I do have control: OF ME. He can think what he wants, be sarcastic and melodramatic, and he can blame me all he wants. Right now, I see it as his projection of his own insecurities and low self-image. He told me recently that the reason he doesn't want me to get a job out of the house is because he thinks some other guy will sweep me off my feet and that I'll leave him. Well, at least he's honest, LOL. For someone who constantly says that I got the short end of the stick in this relationship, he sure does do a lot of blaming and projecting on me. You'd think he'd work harder to keep me instead of trying to push me away.
Oh well, it's all part of his baggage and I don't have to carry it anymore.
Just wish I could get past some of my intimacy issues and take down some walls so I could rid myself of my anger. I'm still ticked off about the DUI and it's been almost a month. Baby steps, that's what I keep telling myself, LOL!