I could have written your post two years ago (or my own version of it). I remember asking my RAH once "why do I have so much power over you and your life? I don't want it".
I was also amazed at just how much he could mind read. I mean, he was regularly telling me exactly what I was thinking and feeling and why.
When I stopped reacting to it, it slowly stopped working for him. I got very good at being vague - so when this stuff happened, I would say "huh" or "really" or my favorite: "what?"
He's over 16 months sober now, and I am happy to report he doesn't mind read anymore. Apparently that was his own stuff he was trying to project onto me. He really couldn't read my mind after all. Huh. Really (said sarcastically).
Mind reading is bait. Don't get hooked.