Thread: Devastated
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Old 03-01-2012, 11:17 AM
  # 14 (permalink)  
Peter G
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Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Singapore
Posts: 737
Like everyone here is suggesting, you are not processing anything by drinking. You are doing the exact opposite, merely delaying the inevitable grief you will have to face sooner or later. I'll add from experience, as harsh as it may sound, drinking to grieve the loss of anyone is absolutely doing a disservice to the memory of that person.

I am truly sorry for your loss no matter how you choose to react to such overwhelming news. There's not too much worse that we experience in this life, IMO. As someone who has also lost quite a few loved ones, people and family as close to me as close gets, my advice is that you deal with it head on, right now, with a sober frame of mind.

Someone extremely wise told me this when my Mother died years back (RIP): ...

"When you drink your way through loss or the many tragedies of living, it will interrupt the natural flow of emotions you have inside, emotions that need to be let out without any obstacles and interruption. What's left behind in your soul becomes faulty, maladaptive, and will truly fester and leave deep scars far beyond the original sadness. In turn, given time the natural grief and indignation of your loss will morph, presenting itself in an entirely different set of future crises."

If you can Chiyo, honor your friends memory now and don't let booze take this one horrible thing and make it many.
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