Thread: GF is an addict
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Old 02-29-2012, 03:06 AM
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stickywater
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Gilbert, AZ
Posts: 22
GF is an addict

Hi everyone. I am new to the forum and i just would like to post a thread of the current situation that I am in. I am fairly new to the disease of addiction. My girlfriend, who i have a 15 month old son with, has an addiction to heroin...and more recently coke as well. She has 4 girls from a previous marriage and i have a son and saughter from a previous marriage as well. She confessed to me when she was at 17 months pregnant with our son, that she had been taking pain pills(opiates) for the last 3 years. She got on subutex shortly after she told me this and other than a rough pregnancy and being born premature, our son was ok. We broke up pretty much right after he was born, but tried to reamin civil with eachother. I learned over this past summer that she was pregnant again, and she said it was mine. Although it was a possibility, it was very hard for me to believe anything she said anymore(there had been many lies and unbelieveable stories after we split up). She ended up having a miscarriage back in October(about 20 weeks along)...she told me that she felt as if she was down to a low enough dose of subutex that she could quit cold turkey. Of course she got sick, and started w/d. This is why she thinks she miscarried, and most likely is the reason. I didn't learn until a month later that after that miscarriage, she had started using IV heroin. She was using about .15 grams every 3 hours...so 2-3 grams a day. and she only is 115 lbs. Sparing you all the drama and detail, I told her I could not let her take my son anymore and we both had hired attorneys. She would take our son and her girls with to buy drugs, and obviously she was driving while under the influence...although she stated that she is fine and just uses not to get sick, to maintain. Well I have done a lot of research on addiction, and had an awesome councellor from last May thru October. I had no choice but to say something to my Supervisor at work (we both work in healthcare, same hospital different areas) because knowing what she was doing a patient could get hurt and that would be on me. I needed to protect myself. She no longer is working there as she refused a drug test. I felt like i was cornered into going to CPS because i was afraid she was going to come take our son from me and i just wanted him to be in a safe environment. I didnt want to do any of these things, but i felt like i had to do what was best for our son. But I have a problem myself...I always seem to end up following my heart instead of my head. I care about her and love her, as she is the mother of my son. I didnt have the heart to go through with court proceedings with my attorney, as she would have been crushed even further. There is so much stuff i am leaving out, but let me get to where we are at now. Back in Early January, i told her how I felt and I had to tell her why I did all the things I did, even though I knew she may not see it the way i saw it. She seemed to understand. then she told me she was back on the subutex, but i knew better that to believe that. But i did not say anything more about it. So things seem to be going a bit better between us, but i can tell that she is still using. We we decided to try and work things out between us, and she wanted our relationship to be "exclusive." So we make it official. I got a call from her friday january 13, she was in w/d asking for help. I picked her up, and took her to the Emergency Room. That is the only way i knew to get her help. She finished a 35 day rehab program at a legit well know place. The first call that i got from her was probably 4 days after she was sent to rehab, and i really did not even recognize her voice, which is a good thing. she sounded good. i have never known her to be off drugs, and it was a trip. I took my son to go visit her on visiting days, and she looked good, and seem to be doing much better. Before exiting rehab, she decided to go to aftercare, a sober living in cali for 90 days. I know this is awesome, and i am very proud of her for doing this. I know there is no cure for the disease of addiction, so I hope for the best but expect the worst. I am doing my best to support her, but it has been hard. i dont really know what to expect when she does come home. we do not live together, but she had mentioned things like marriage and all that but i am a bit weary. i dont want to rush into anything. communication has been at a minimum now that she has been at the sober living for almost 2 weeks. i'll get a text from her every so often and i have only have talked to her once or twice since she has been there. its like the realtionship is on hold for now, but i understand that it is something that doesnt need to be brought up or discussed right now. i imagine they are keeping her real busy and all. i have been to a couple al anons and just started seeing a private counselor as well. thank you for reading...i know this is a bit lengthy. i just really dont know what to expect when she comes back home since we never were together while she was using heroin and coke...
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