Originally Posted by lizatola View Post
See, I know all this. You are right, he's not ready to give up his alcoholic thinking which usually consists of self-pity, depression, fear, trust issues, etc. Heaven forbid if he were to truly get free from this negative thinking, he might actually find more peace. Sigh, I guess that's why I work my own recovery program, right?
In AA's Big Book Bill Wilson says alcoholics are grandiose, selfish, self centered, have both enormous egos and low self esteem. "His majesty the child". We all believe we're "terminally unique", we're different from other alcoholics. After 20 years of hearing alcoholics share about themselves I can say that isn't true. Wilson also says "alcohol is but a symptom" and that we must change our negative thinking and character defects or we'll return to the bottle.
It helps to understand alcoholism is classified by the AMA as a mental illness. Alcoholics motivated can work on themselves (therapy, the Steps) and change over time. It's very hard work but those folks have good lives. But it is only in the hands of the alcoholic what he/she does.