I am really struggling with what to do... D6 isn't asking me about it and it feels like the elephant in the room right now... I dont want to upset her by forcing her to think and talk about it but it feels like I should address it...
At her age it's so hard to know what is best to say or not say... Her T has said for some time that telling her facts but very very minimally is okay... I'm just not sure what to say and honestly am afraid of what she might ask me and not have a good answer for her...
I really appreciate what you wrote me below and it makes a lot of sense and I imagine she is scared and confused and blames herself (the amt that she says Sorry all the time for everything-- just like me-- is disturbing)... Sigh... She is in bed already (she is my kid who ASKS to go to bed at 6:30 bc she is so tired by days end-- her sister however who is 3 would stay up all night partying with juice boxes and granola bars if I let her!) so I will have to think about all of this and talk to her tomorrow after school. I don't want to have a heavy talk with her and then ship her off to school in the morning... Then again maybe I should address it sooner than later...
My head has been POUNDING all day and I honestly found myself a few times today wondering why! LOL. Ridiculous right? I am about to go to bed myself!
Originally Posted by
blwninthewind You know what...I've been thinking about you...and praying for you...
and it is OKAY for you to sit your D6 down and just tell her.
Her dad is not supposed to be at the house. It isn't just YOU that decided that but that other grown ups (like the police and a nice judge) decided that isn't good.
Her DAD decided to break the rules.
HE CHOSE to do that.
He knew he would get in trouble but did it anyway.
It is OKAY to say these things...you aren't bad mouthing her daddy...you are giving her some much needed information.
She is only 6...but she feels the anxiety and fear from not knowing exactly what is going on. Her world has been shaken...and you just have to be there to be honest (age appropriate honesty) and let her know that it's OKAY to feel mad, bad, sad....but none of this is HER fault.
because I promise you even though her daddy said it was YOUR fault he was going to jail (that piece of s#%^!)..but she thinks it's HER fault because he drove HER home, to spend time with HER....(we all know that isn't the truth, it was control and manipulation to use her to hurt you) but her thoughts aren't reality based. She's too little. Too scared and too shameful of what is going on ....and she just needs some truth.
Praying for you both!