barriefield

Thanks for all the kind & supportive words. I truly appreciate it. It has been a real eye-opener these past few days on this site. I have been reading post after post and everything sounds so familiar and gosh am I ever grateful to have stumbled across this site.

My Sister is already under CPS's watchful eye because of what had happened with one of her kids. I trust that they will be keeping an eye on the situation with her kids for the time-being. I am thankful to the person who did call though, even if it got my sister suspicious with us because she was sure it was one of us (me, my mom, and other sister).

I think that was a bit of a wakeup call for my Sister. Because it meant that her & her BF couldn't just "talk" or cry their way out of trouble and their situation. That with CPS the kids would come first, no matter how hard the consequences on my Sister.

Oxys addictions are pretty bad in my town, so I think that this is what she is/was taking. Like I mentioned, Sister seems to think that what she was taking isn't that "serious", as if popping those pills wasn't like shooting up or snorting powder. Our community health care system no longer pays or prescribes these pills, and I read in the news that OxyContins (and it's generic brand) are being banned/destroyed by the end of March. So I am happy to hear that. It probably won't be helping those that are currently addicted, but here's hoping that it prevents new people from experimenting and becoming addicted.

I am doing my best to take care of myself. Looking back now, it seems so scary and strange to have been so stressed out and obsessive about Her. I think her "shunning" will benefit me more than her. The only time I thought about Her was when my Mom would talk about her.

I really don't know how to deal with that though. I mean, yeah it's nice to hear that yesterday my Sister and her kids had a nice big family dinner and they were all loved up, but I feel like she had an ulterior motive.

I really don't know if she does it on purpose, but my Mom makes me feel like a bad sister. Like I said before "I" am the bad guy. She seems so caught up in my Sister's recovery, and potential success. That I'm not sure she realizes how hard it's going to be for my Sister to overcome this addiction, especially with my Sister's boyfriend in the picture who is a big pothead (who more than likely WON'T be quitting that). They both seem to think that it's all puppies and daisies from here on out because Sister is in a program. It makes me feel so negative and pessimistic when I question her recovery. I feel like I am on the defensive all the time and they are on the offensive.

So yesterday when my Mom was telling me what a wonderful day my Sister was having, it really felt like she was saying "see. See! SEE! how good your Sister's life is now". It's rough because I love that me and my Mom spend so much time together.

Would it be wrong to ask her not to talk about my Sister to me for the time-being?