LaTeeDa- I figured that was the message ... I didn't take what you were saying as if you thought dysfunction was no biggie-- I just found your post made me think about the similarities b/w families w active alcoholism vs not and I kind of got rambling! Shocker for me, right?! And I agree 200% that there is no dysfunctional family that stays together that is better than a healthy one apart. However, for the first year I was around here I probably tried to argue otherwise.... I don't really know when I can pinpoint things changing but my whole perspective is different these days and man am I glad for that!