Wow...I'm new on here...I got on here because I don't know where else to turn anymore. Then I read ur post.....and thought, r u kiddin...it sounds like my life!!! I myself an a recovern addict in a relationship w/an addict. I have no job, no money, no car, kids making it hard to walk away. I have been with my him since we were 16yrs old...now 42, with 2 children, 2 grandchildren...and there is nothing more I want then for him to love me/us NOT the drug. I want to be with him till death does us part.......however, my/our life has been on hold for along time and I'm afraid it might all pass me by if I don't learn to love myself. Anyone who is part of the alcoholic/addicts life becomes sick right along with them....and thats where I'm at today. This is why I checked out this website....I want to get better. Once we get well, so will our lifes/and childrens life. Its a terrible place to be and my heartaches, but I'm tired of being sick and if he isn't then all I can do is continue to pray for him. Being a recovern addict myself, I know no one can stop anyone from drinkn/drugn.....its ONLY when that person is ready!! Its a hard thing to swallow believe me I know...but I promise you this...ITS TRUE!!! So, focus on u gettin well (as the partner of an alcoholic)and things will fall into place....they will!!!