AH draining the life out of me!
Last night my AH was outside smoking a cigarette and he just got in his van and drove away! Left the garage lights on, dog outside, didn't say a word! He had a few beers and smoked some pot (but says, of course, that he doesn't have a problem with alcohol or marijuana) prior to leaving... he shut his phone off and disappeared until 3AM when he tried to sneak in the house... suffering from his crack or cocaine induced paranoia.
I have finally told him I am through. My 18-month old and I don't deserve this. He has dragged me down both emotionally and financially. Last night I cancelled both credit cards of mine that he uses (for a business that I started for him). He called this morning after I dropped our daughter off and was on my way to work and said that (because I cancelled the cards and didn't leave him any cash) I had better buy him a f pack of cigarettes and drop them off and that I was putting him out of business and I would be sorry! He is crazy! At 41 he doesn't have any responsibility whatsoever. He has no money saved of course, (I pay him from the business and pay bills with it), he doesn't have a clue about our bills and buys and does whatever he wants, takes people out for dinner etc. I KNOW that I have enabled him and I am at fault for helping him so much.
I am doing my best to keep things afloat at this time, helping him with the business so that I have extra money coming in etc. until I get the bills down. It is a difficult situation to get out of... but I am proud for finally telling him how I really feel. Telling him how selfish and greedy he is, how disrespectful he is to me... careless.
He is home wallowing in self-pity again... he will be making promises once again... and I need to stay strong and on my path to peace for my daughter and I. He tries to scare me with threats and tells me I won't be able to see her that much, that I will be sorry and that our daughter will know the truth about what I did to our marriage!! Thank you for your support... I have gotten stronger since I joined SR.