You still have an outlet Dazed - but it's a positive one...working on yourself and your recovery
Believe me I felt about myself the same way you seem to...I felt worthless and useless and I despised myself...noone hated me as much as I did.
But what I didn't realise was the extent to which alcohol was contributing to that - even for weeks after I quit.
Stick with it - maybe your perceptions will change a little.
Apart form that, you have the chance now - in recovery - to look at those things you don't like about yourself...and fix them.
You have the chance to not just fill that void but *heal* it.
I hope you'll take that chance