Normal? Hell yes. Healthy? Hell no. And, of course, it hurts you far, far, far more than it hurts him. In fact, at this point he needs to be just a footnote in your life-- a cautionary tale. Please consider going 100 percent No Contact with him. Don't reach out to him, ignore him reaching out to you, defriend, delete, etc., any connections to him or anybody else who communicates through him. That's first.
Then focus 100 percent on you and your recovery. Do this with counseling, Alanon, or both. I did both.
I found that when I stopped wanting to kill other people that my life got a lot better. That doesn't mean the world won't be a better place when they die because it will be a better place when they die, it just means I'm not letting that fact ruin my life.
Cyranoak