Silver Lining
Hi everyone. I just started on here but I'm hoping that someone can help me understand what's going on here. I never thought it would come to this but I don't know who to turn to for help anymore.
The situation is that I've been with my boyfriend I'll call B.J. for about a year now. He's an awesome guy and I love him to death. We have so much in common, we want the same things from life, and we love each other's families. I generally trust and respect him, but there is this one problem. I can't handle him when he drinks and he can't control himself.
First of all I should say that he's never physically laid a hand on me or anything. Mostly I just feel like I'm babysitting him. He's doesn't have to drink everyday for the most part but I guess you could say he's a binge drinker. When he does start, he goes crazy. Most of the time it happens when he's stressed out about things. The more stressed he is, the more often it happens and the worse it is. He embarrases me, and worse, he embarrases himself. He's broken things, fallen over, gone to places drunk when it was totally inappropriate, he's been arrested for an impaired and then drove around like that afterward, "borrowed" money that he new was for bills, and he even wet the bed one night. I've tried to explain that I love him so much but he's not my "B.J" when he's drunk. He know's he puts our relationship in jeopardy everytime he drinks and he even said he'd quit for me one day but he can't. He's done the hiding it, and the lying about it although he doesn't do that as much anymore since he knows I can usually figure it out.
The reason I'm here is because it hurts so bad that he can't stop. I do believe he loves me and I believe he know's what he does is wrong. I just don't know how to deal with his problem. I get mean to him sometimes out of frusteration and I'm hoping someone can tell me how to help him instead of just yelling at him. Sometimes I have to wonder if it's all worth it. Does anyone know if there's any hope?