Originally Posted by
m1k3 So I was thinking of attending an ACA meeting tonight and was curious to find out how it compares to an AL-ANON meeting.
Not particularly nervous or anything about going but trying to be prepared for what to expect at the meeting.
Thanks,
The way it works for me is that Al-Anon is more about staying in the present, functioning as well as possible one day at a time, and dealing with the dynamics that go on when you interact with people on a day-to-day basis.
ACA -- again, just how it comes across for me -- is more concerned with looking at the past and understanding how we got here. Taking a look at the big picture to identify patterns that repeat over and over again in our lives -- stuff like that. I recently did a 5th Step with my ACA sponsor, and when he'd heard my answers to the questions in the ACA workbook, he said, "You have a pattern of abandoning your own success. Every time you get really good at something, you stop doing it and move on to something else." He also noted -- again, by looking at how I describe my life, over time -- that I tend to think that I don't count. My views don't count, my feelings don't count, my skills don't count, my achievements don't count...
I don't count.
By becoming aware of these patterns, I'm in a better position to become (Step 6) "entirely ready" to have these flaws go away (I'm avoiding the phrase "defects of character" because, like a lot of ACAs, I feel that I spend enough time beating myself up as it is, without being told that I have defects of character, even though that may be true!).
A lot of Al-Anon and ACA principles overlap -- but for me, the main difference is that Al-Anon is all about getting through today, and the present, more constructively and with less stress and drama; while ACA is more focused on understanding how we got to be... how we are, so we can get better. That's just me talking, though -- there isn't anything in either program that really comes out and says that....
T